Bodies of Water

Ahhhh, summer! It's here, it's intense, I already have a sunburn. Despite popular belief (looking at you, Americans!) we actually get a pretty decent summer in Canada. We crawl from our igloos, reign up the huskies, and welcome the summer with arms wide open, shedding our seal skin coats and dancing nekkid by the fire!

Toronto is a fantastic city, I love it with all my heart, and the people ain't half bad either! I've had amazing times in this place, many too inebriated to recall, but I'll do my best.

Sailing the high seas of Lake Ontario is a blast. I remember one summer, at least 10 years ago, a beauty of a clear, calm day, my Uncle Wolf and I were out on the lake and all of the sudden, these massive waves came out of nowhere. Swells as high as an elephant's eye, I tells ya. And my uncle is struggling to get the engine working, pounding the hell out of it with a hammer! I was intensely scared, but it was exhilarating to the max. An adrenaline rush is an understatement, I truly thought we were done for. And then things settled down and we sailed back to port, like nothing happened.

It is not the first time bodies of water have tried to kill me. I almost drowned in Mexicao as a wee child, floating on my boogie board, pretending I was young Jim in Treasure Island, still one of my fav books. I was about 10, and got sucked into a whirlpool near some reefs and this Mexican fisherman saw me struggling and dove head-first in after me and totally saved my ass. His feet were ripped up by the coral, he risked his life to save a total stranger. My parents were amazing grateful and got him drunk. I remember feeling embarassed because my parents were screaming and crying, but I will never forget what that man did. In fact, I think of it often, not sure if that is weird?


[post edit: My father recalls the experience:
"A few notes that your six [not ten] year old memory might have missed-

That beach was unusually flat and had surprising undertow.  You got caught in it and sailed past the fisherman, in knee deep water, very quickly.  I was running after you.  He was at the edge of a drop off.  When you went sailing by, he instinctively dove after you, grabbing your line, only to discover that, like many coastal people, he didn't know how to swim.  The undertow was still sucking the three of us out.  I had gotten to him and was fighting it to no avail.  There we were; you, him and me, in a line, heading to Hawaii.

Then came the wave.  It practically pushed us, including your boogie board, all the way back to the beach.

The whole adventure lasted less than a minute.

Damn right, we fed him and got him drunk.  Its not often you get to share something like that.]

A great time for vino, indeed! And it's never a bad time for a cat flight! 

Bees. Enough stings and you could die. We're systematically destroying bees everyday, or so Scarlett Johhaaaaaansen tells me. I just can't stop staring at her lips, so I'm not sure why/how we're killing 'em.

I tried uploading a delightful Zappa song, but I can't figger out how to do it on this blasted contraption, so this will do just fine, right? Have a safe, intoxicated summer, one and all!! Huzzaaah!